Am I taking CRAZY pills here?

My sister got married.  Oh yeah, she got married and had a WEDDING.  When I got married I pretty much let my Mom and my sister plan it because my sister has been obsessed about weddings since she could say “lace covered chiffon” and they both have pretty great style.  I did have to ixnay on the tangerine sashes though—my colors were Navy Blue and PUMPKIN, thank you very much.  Other than that though, it was in their well-manicured and capable hands. 

My sister however, the one mentioned above, was SLIGHTLY more involved than I was.  And by involved, I want to share a story with you.

Do you see these flags?  I made these flags.  My now brother-in-law is quite the walking musical consortium and she wanted to include that in the decorations: sheet music pennants.  Should be easy enough, I had just made cloth ones “for fun” that ended up being way more complicated then they were worth, so paper ones should be pretty simple.  But this is my sister, I should have known.

“Oh and I’d like them tea-dyed” she chirped before floating out the door (my sister is a ballet dancer, so she floats most places).  Okee doke, I thought, that shouldn’t be too complicated.

Here is the step-by-step process for making THESE particular pennant flags.

1. Draw up pattern for Pennant flags that include flap to fold over the string (with the appropriately angled sides so that you don’t have to cut the little extra that would result if you just folded over the top) making a beautiful seamless edge.  Pattern should resemble a stretched out super man logo.
2. Congratulate self for being so smart about including the flap to fold over the string.
3. Undo the staples on the book of sheet music, so that you cut out twice as many at a time.
4. Congratulate self for also thinking of this.
5. Find the best configuration for getting the MOST flags out of one bi-folded sheet of music, having lines touch each other so one cut is actually four cuts. 
6. Trace pattern in configuration.
7. Cut out flags.
8. Buy another book of sheet music at sketchy thrift store because your sister wants to make sure she has enough.
9. Remove staples from book of sheet music.
10.  Find best configuration to get the most flags out of one bi-folded sheet of music.
11.  Double check with sister on flag configuration, which results in lines of music being STRAIGHT, instead of diagonal like she had requested.
12.  Breathe sigh of relief when she approves this.
13.  Trace pattern in configuration.
14.  Cut out flags.
15.  Prepare bucket of hot water to tea dye the flags.  Include scarf your mother asked you to tea dye.
16.  Get worried when you test one flag and the paper seems weak.
17.  Sister suggests SPRAYING the tea water with a spray water bottle.
18.  Place hot water and tea bag inside of spray water bottle.
19.  Curse when tea bag breaks, causing spray bottle to clog.
20.  Decide to tea dye paper quickly so as to keep the integrity of the paper but hopefully dye them enough.
21.  Curse when paper just looks wet.
22.  Have stroke of brilliance and borrow brother’s paint set.  Mix brown and yellow paint in watery solution that resembles opaque tea-water.
23.  Splatter over the still-wet pennant flags.
24.  Find out from Mother that Sister thinks they are “Too orangey.”
25.  Curse cheap paint and have meltdown because you dealing with a high maintenance wedding and its that time of the month.
26.  Mom swoops in and RE-tea dyes flags.
27.  Take flags with you to beautiful Dana Point, where husband has week of job shadowing for his territory. 
28.  Thank your Creator that your husband has a great job.
29.  Thank your Creator that your husband has a job.
30.  Thank your Creator that you have a husband.
31.  Remove all flags at Sister’s request that are “too orangey” on both sides even after re-tea-dye.
32.  Sit in hotel room and iron all flags to get the wet wrinkles out of them while watching reruns of King of Queens.
33.  Sort through flags to find the “less orangey side” to be the front.
34.  Go for a swim.
35.  Sit in hotel room and fold top crease (TOWARD from orangey side) on all flags so now they just resemble flags and not stretched out super man logos while watching reruns of Everybody Loves Raymond.
36.  Meticulously glue over crease and then place string inside crease and carefully fold over to create finished flag.  Repeat 12 times.
37.  Curse when Elmer’s glue keeps getting clogged.
38.  Switch to backup stick glue.
39.  Thank the heavens that this works.
40.  Repeat 15 times.
41.  Start to get anxious that you didn’t double check what LENGTH between each flag your sister wanted.
42.  Continue onward because you’ve already started and the wedding is two days away.  Try to ignore the erosion of stomach acid.
43.  Finish flags and bring them back down to San Diego.
44.  Heave sigh of relief when sister approves of them.
45.  Congratulate passive-aggressive bridezilla of a sister on her upcoming nuptuals and wonder why you don’t drink.

Congratulations to my little sister and her new husband William--may you enjoy every idiosyncrasy you both have until the end of time!  (Doesn't her dress look STUNNING???  My Mom did it.  She's amazing.)